Mom looks at my hair (and my son’s hair) and asks me why I don’t “put something on it”. When I ask her why, she says becaue it “looks dry”.

Giving it some thought over the past few weeks I realize a few things:
1. My natural hair, with its VERY tight curls, appears “dry”, but in fact, if one were to examine a strand, it has an immense shine. Healthier than it has probably been since birth, maybe.
2. My mom is used to seeing my hair relaxed. She is fine with natural, but is still looking for “good hair”. Admittedly, I have the coarsest hair of all my family members. Meh…whatever…
3. We are so conditioned (hahaha…pun!) to believe that “silky” and “shiny” in hair apperance = “pretty”.
4. Depite what India.Irie sang…I AM my hair. I embrace it (and me) in all its forms, but (for now) it is organic, coarse, introverted, tangled, and stronger than one can imagine…just like me, if you look closely, you’ll see the shine.
5. My scalp no longer peels and itches the way it used to when it was relaxed. I don’t miss that at all.
6. I do “put something on it”. Usually coconut oil or almond oil. Sometimes olive oil. If I can eat it, I’ll put it in there…lol. Otherwise, I’m not so inclined to use product. (I’ve got a conspiracy theory about Black hair products, but that is another post.)
7. I’m (finally) learning to accept what nature has endowed me with, for better or worse.
8. I’m lazy. I’m middle aged. I’m married. I’d rather focus on less superficial things and people…genuine joys of life. Sure, I like to “look nice” but…I’m lazy. You’ll notice more when I put a little effort in. I’m not investing that kind of time every day.
9. The facade is expensive. I’ve saved so much (time, money, strands of hair, stress) since I’ve gone natural.
10. My mom means well. I love her, she loves me. That’s all that matters.

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