I’ve never been a fan of people who celebrate their OWN birthdays. Individuals really have little to do with being born. (Mothers should be celebrated on people’s birthdays!!) and EVERYONE has a fucking birthday. After about 21, we should just grow up and be happy to be alive everyday. But, that’s just me.

When I taught at an all girls high school, many would get giddy with the idea that their birthday was approaching. Then would request THEY not have homework on their birthday! I finally had to make an announcement at the start of the year when we went over the syllabus: “There are billions of people in the world and only 365 days in a year, so EVERY day is LOTS of people’s birthday. You are not unique or special except to those who know and love you. You are in HIGH SCHOOL. Birthdays will NOT be celebrated in my classroom.”

I’m even more stunned that grown-ass adults shout out their own birthdays. If someone else wants to do it…well, that is nice. If a person has survived a near-fatal illness, accident or addiction…I can understand your gratitude at seeing another birthday. And, of course, there are the “milestone” birthdays 1, 10, 13, 16, 18, 21, 50, 75 and 100. Then there are the people who celebrate all week or the entire month!! Really?? When is enough too much? And then there are those folks who don’t work on their birthday. Kinda ironic condidering that was probably the day we worked the hardest to begin with.

Now if you’re one of those people who takes your birthday as an opportunity to laud the greatness of you…yayy? I’m all for individual happiness and self-worth. But don’t try to put that on everyone else. I’ve known people to feel blue because they didn’t get a cake, gifts greetings, etc. from others. (Well, when you make such a big deal out of you, how can anyone else top that?) I think some of these self-celebrators do so due to some slight they suffered or perceived many years ago. Now they’ve taken up their own flag. “I’m gonna do me!!” Ok…but I don’t want to see you “do you” in any form.

I’m all for friends and family conspiring to celebrate another’s birthday. I like throwing and/or attending celebrations of good friends and family. Who doesn’t like a nice party? The celebration should be had steeped in sincerity, not because he or she will “feel badly” if we don’t make a fuss. Or worse, the effor is extended in order to expect the same when another’s birthday rolls around.

This time of year, with the holidays approaching, we (in theory and if Christian) should be preparing to celebrate Jesus’s (contrived) birthday. And sadly, even that has turned into more of a way to shop and reward ourselves for something we had no part in.